I headed into this previous weekend feeling very assured that I’d have the ability to fully end the mural wall within the studio, and present up this morning to point out you all types of images of the completed wall. However everyone knows how plans go, proper?
Sadly, issues didn’t work out how I had deliberate them. I simply have a pair extra issues to do (principally electrical, however a bit little bit of portray), however it’s nonetheless not completed. *Sigh*
Matt’s M.S. has actually wreaked havoc this yr, and this summer season has been particularly troublesome. Due to M.S., Matt could be very delicate to climate extremes, whether or not it’s excessive scorching or excessive chilly. Due to his sensitivities, we’ve to maintain our thermostat on 67 levels yr spherical. If it will get a lot hotter than that, he loses all energy. If the temperature dips a lot beneath that, he will get chilly and that causes his muscular tissues to grab and tremor.
There have been occasions that I’ve examined to see if that is all in his thoughts. With out telling him, I’ve on events raised the thermostat to 69 levels, considering that there’s no means he would discover. However each single time, with out exception, inside about 90 minutes, he’s calling me into the room, asking me what the thermostat is ready on, as a result of he’s feeling scorching. I’ve by no means been capable of get away with elevating the thermostat. He can at all times inform.
So you may think about how this previous Texas summer season was for him. I misplaced depend of the variety of 100+ diploma days we had in a row with no aid in sight (I feel the streak was one thing like 45 days in a row), and so lots of these days had “looks like” temperatures surpassing 110 levels, and even as much as 115 levels. There have been so many days with excessive temps and excessive humidity, which is a horrible mixture for Matt. When it will get that scorching, it doesn’t matter that our thermostat is ready on 67 levels as a result of there’s no means our air conditioner can sustain. (We’ve by no means had an issue till this yr, and regardless of what number of occasions we had it checked and labored on, it simply wouldn’t sustain. However this was additionally the second hottest Texas summer season on document.)
For sure, the final three-and-a-half months have been horrible for Matt. And when issues are horrible for Matt, they’re no stroll within the park for me, both. He has required far more assist and a focus from me over the previous couple of months than he normally does. And that implies that my work on the home slows and my progress appears to crawl at a snail’s tempo.
I do know my common readers perceive our state of affairs, and I’m so grateful for the grace and understanding that y’all prolong to me. Different DIY bloggers who’ve able-bodied spouses serving to them with initiatives (or taking good care of different issues whereas they’ll deal with initiatives) can end these initiatives in a fraction of the time it takes me these days, and it’s generally troublesome for me to not really feel responsible about that. However then I remind myself of my one single decision that I made for 2023. No guilt. I grew to become decided that I wasn’t going to heap guilt upon myself for issues I can’t management.
Particularly, what I mentioned was this: I’m only one individual, and I solely have a lot time. I’m going to do what I can (whereas actually attempting to make use of my time effectively), not do what I can’t, and really feel zero guilt about it. (You can read more about my one solitary resolution for 2023 here.) That mindset has helped me a lot throughout this troublesome yr.
However again to this previous weekend. Matt and I celebrated our twenty first wedding ceremony anniversary final Thursday. Twenty-one years! That’s laborious to imagine. However, as has been the case for the previous couple of months, Matt simply wasn’t feeling as much as leaving the home, so he let me select a restaurant, and I went and picked up a meal for us from my favourite restaurant. (My favourite restaurant is Rosa’s Café, by the best way. 😀 I’m a easy individual. Give me fajitas, and I’m glad.) So we ate lunch, watched a number of of our favourite reveals, and had a really enjoyable afternoon.
However later that night, he began feeling actually weak. That didn’t shock both of us. He’s very delicate to meals, which is why he feels his greatest when he eats an unusually restrictive weight loss plan (steak, butter, salt, and water). However it’s simply so laborious to eat such a restrictive weight loss plan! Simply think about that every one you may ever ingest is steak, butter, salt, and water. How boring. So he craves some selection generally, however he and I at all times know that he’ll pay a value for it. It’s a commerce off that he’s keen to make generally. And certain sufficient, on Thursday, he paid a value for consuming Rosa’s with the weak point and exhaustion he felt later that night.
Typically, when that occurs, he simply wants an excellent evening’s and he wakes up the following morning feeling (his) regular once more. However he didn’t sleep effectively in any respect, and he wakened Friday morning feeling exhausted, weak, and groggy. He appeared actually out of it, like he had taken a muscle relaxer or one thing. The entire day was like that, like he couldn’t totally get up. He slept quite a bit in the course of the day, however naps in the course of the day usually don’t assist Matt. They simply make him weaker and groggier. So I just about caught by him all day on Friday, not desirous to get too distant (like working in my studio) in case he wanted assist ingesting water or one thing like that.
He slept higher on Friday evening, and did a bit higher on Saturday, though he nonetheless wasn’t again to (his) regular. And since I used to be coping with some sciatic nerve ache that morning, I actually didn’t need to prepare dinner, so Matt wished me to go to Sonic to get us some lunch. For some very unusual cause, Sonic is without doubt one of the solely locations the place I can get meals that Matt doesn’t react negatively to. I’ve no rationalization for it, as a result of clearly, Sonic isn’t heathy meals. However about 98% of the time, he can eat it with out struggling any damaging penalties. Like I mentioned, I can’t clarify it.
What I didn’t notice is that Matt solely ate half of a fairly small hamburger, and that’s it. And that’s all he ate all day lengthy. He gave the impression to be doing higher than the day earlier than, so I after we ate, I headed to the studio to work, and he by no means mentioned a factor to me the remainder of the day about being hungry and desirous to eat. So I simply saved on working till bedtime, not realizing that every one he had eaten all day lengthy was half of a small hamburger.
Sunday, I went to breakfast with my mother, with the plan that I’d cease and get Matt Sonic on the best way dwelling, sit with him whereas he ate, after which spend the remainder of the day engaged on the studio. However once I bought dwelling from breakfast with my mother, Matt wasn’t doing effectively in any respect. I checked his temperature to see if he had a fever, however it was regular. And he didn’t appear sick. This wasn’t like a flu or COVID. It was simply excessive weak point and exhaustion, so he didn’t need to (and possibly wouldn’t have been capable of) eat straight away.
So I spend some time attempting to assist him in numerous methods — serving to him drink iced water to chill down (he was complaining about being scorching, however then he’d get chilly, after which scorching once more). I gave him some electrolyte drink. That appeared to perk him up a bit. And I simply saved attempting to do different issues that might hold him comfy. Once more, I didn’t need to stray too far in case he wanted me.
After a few hours, he was lastly able to eat, so I put his meals in a bowl and gave it to him, and we watched a present whereas he ate. When the present was carried out, he mentioned he was completed consuming. He gave the impression to be doing higher, so I headed the studio to work. I used to be lastly capable of begin working round 7:00pm.
After about an hour, I headed again to the bed room to test on Matt, and as soon as once more, he was doing terribly. Once more, he had excessive weak point, issue speaking, and so on. I attempted giving him extra electrolyte drink, however it wasn’t serving to this time. After about half-hour of attempting different issues, and him attempting to talk to me (however I couldn’t perceive him), I lastly understood him to say that he wished to go to the hospital.
Nicely, when he will get like that, I can’t get him into his wheelchair. So although we’ve a wheelchair van now, there’s no means I can get him to the hospital. When he will get that weak, it’s like attempting to wrangle a 200-pound mound of Jello. So I referred to as 911 and the EMS got here. They took all of his vitals, and all the pieces was regular apart from blood strain, which was elevated. He normally has regular blood strain, so I’m nearly 100% certain it was elevated as a result of he was feeling anxious and scared and giving himself a bit mini panic assault.
After they talked to him some time, he truly appeared to relax a bit, and even laughed at a number of of their jokes. The lighter issues bought within the room, the higher he may converse, and the better it was to know him. And that’s once I realized that for the second day in a row, all he had eaten was half of a (fairly small) hamburger.
So principally, Matt had been nearly fasting for 2 days. And if there’s something you might want to learn about Matt, it’s that he can’t quick. Matt likes to quick, and if he may have his means, he’d quick for per week at a time. And whereas he used to have the ability to quick with ease and really feel nice doing so, he merely can’t do it anymore. Fasting makes him extremely weak and exhausted. So whereas he hadn’t precisely been fasting, he had been consuming so little that he might as effectively have been fasting.
After the EMTs had been right here for some time, and Matt’s nervousness appeared to raise, he lastly determined that he didn’t need to to go to the hospital. However they inspired him to eat one thing and to attempt to get an excellent evening’s sleep. In order quickly as they left, I made him a ribeye steak. However as a result of he was so weak, I needed to mix it for him (yep, I blended up a ribeye steak, together with plenty of butter and MCT oil as a result of good fat are mind meals), and I stood by the mattress and fed him blended steak with plenty of fats. And as he ate, it was like watching him “recharge”. By the point he completed, he had extra vitality and seemed extra alert than he had in days. It was wonderful.
So after an excellent evening’s sleep (which he lastly bought final evening), Matt is lastly again to his regular this morning. And he and I are each so relieved that we averted one other hospital keep. I’ve given him yet one more lecture (he loves my lectures, I’m certain 😀 ) about how he can’t quick, regardless of how a lot he desires to, and I’ve given each of us an excellent lecture on the way it simply doesn’t pay to eat meals that he is aware of he’s going to react to. Even when he thinks the tradeoff is price it for one yummy meal, it’s nearly by no means price it. The price is means too excessive for him.
In order that was our weekend. Possibly as we speak I can get an excellent chunk of time to work on the studio. Or perhaps I would like a nap. We’ll see. However what I can inform you for certain is that M.S. is an actual bitch. (Sorry, however not sorry. I usually hold issues PG-rated round right here, however after 19 years of us coping with Matt’s M.S., that’s simply what I’m feeling this morning.)
Addicted 2 Adorning is the place I share my DIY and adorning journey as I rework and adorn the 1948 fixer higher that my husband, Matt, and I purchased in 2013. Matt has M.S. and is unable to do bodily work, so I do nearly all of the work on the home on my own. You can learn more about me here.
